New Year. New You?

It's been a while, I know.  The holiday season was beautifully simple, and a much needed escape from the chaos of my life.  But, here we are, half way through January, and I find myself being sucked back into the swirling vortex of work, home, kids, church, appointments, etcetera, etcetera.  While I didn't make any particular New Year's Resolutions, (they're just not my thing) I do have hope of simplifying my life a bit this year.  That may be wishful thinking, but I'm going to think it none the less!  I'm also making it a point to find time for myself amongst the madness.  I want to learn how to play the guitar mom bought me 6 years ago!  I'm also taking time to read.  One of my favorite pastimes had become just that...the past!  Thanks to my hubby (a.k.a. Santa), reading has become much more convenient with my new Kindle!  Anytime I want a book, it's there at the click of a button!  I love it!!! 

So, I've been reading feverishly since Christmas.  I started a book this week called "So You Don't Want to Go to Church Anymore".  As I started reading, I  could definitely see parallels to things going on in our Church.  Things that need to be "fixed".  For instance, the way we focus on rules over love.  Or the lack of action due to differing opinions.  Even more critical points attacked our foundation.  Do we really, truly understand who Jesus was?  What else lies within our church walls?  Within the heart of the church?  Lies, manipulation, hurt, anger, mistrust, fear...some of this is pretty hard to swallow.  But, as I continue to read, this book is becoming more personal. 

It's not really about changing your church at all, but about changing yourself.  But, I'm perfect right?  So, what's this got to do with me God?  HAHAHA!  Here's a toughy...what's your motivation in service?  Do we truly do it to worship and  love?  Sure we do...but then again, that pat on the back feels pretty good too.   How many times have you ever volunteered to do something because the voice in your head was saying, "If I don't do it, no one will, or at least it won't be done right!".  Hmmmm?  What about who we help?  Do we love freely with all God's creations, or do we pick and choose?  Or do we offer conditional help?  "Sure we can help you Needy Nancy, as long as you come to our church."  Funny thing is, I don't remember Christ placing conditions on His love for us.  We work so hard to be good Christians, but is that what it's really about?  Are we working to be good or perfect, or to be like Christ?  And, is it US doing the work, or are we fully reliant upon His spirit to provide, and allowing ourselves to become tools of His grace? Do we represent Christ as a spiritual Lord in heaven or as a tangible Saviour living here and now?  I'll be honest here...I'm GUILTY!!!  I've done and still do these things, even if it is unconsciously at times.

This post doesn't offer the answers, but hopefully it will get the ball rolling on your own self reflection, as it has mine.  I encourage you to read the book if you can.  You can download it free at jakecolsen.com.  It is a fictional book, and I want you to keep that in mind as you read.  It is not a "Bible" study.  But, it will provoke thought, self reflection, awareness, clearer vision, and likely some new realizations of your journey with Christ.  There will likely be many more posts as I explore my own spiritual foundations and growth.  And hopefully, if we are truthful and sincere in our search we will all find the "New You" this year.